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Notes about this site
LOOK OUT WORLD
HERE WE COME
FIGHTING BACK
PRANKS
LOST KEYS: Get a hold of some old useless keys (car, house, etc.). Place victim's name, phone number and $50.00 reward... if found and returned. Drop the keys in one of the less desirable areas of town.
GARAGE SALE: Place an ad in the classified section of your local newspaper advertising a GIGANTIC Garage Sale listing the address of your victim. Advertise televisions, cam-corder, vintage automobile, antiques, etc. Sale begins at 6:00 a.m. Come early!
PAPER MONEY: Write "for a good time, call"....and the victim's name and phone number on the edge of several pieces of paper money before spending them. The victim will receive many eye popping inquiries.
DOGS: Purchase a silent dog whistle. In the early hours of the morning (2am-4am) go near the victim's house and blow the silent whistle and the dog will begin to bark uncontrollably until the owner awakes and disciplines the animal. When the owner goes back to bed repeat the process again
ANIMAL POO-POO: With plastic gloves on find some animal poo-poo and place it under the door handles of the victim's automobile. The end result is a sticky situation.
NOISY APARTMENT NEIGHBORS: Place a clock radio or portable stereo in a large cardboard box. Place open end of box next to the wall adjoining the victim's apartment. Tune the radio to whatever obnoxious station you choose. Turn-on when you are away and turn-off when you return home.
FAX MACHINES: Write whatever you wish on 9 pages of 8 1/2 by 11 inch paper and tape them together (end to end). Dial the victim's fax number and start sending the pages through. After page two has been transmitted, tape the top of page 1 to the bottom of page 9 making a continuous loop. The document will continue to cycle until the victim's fax machine has run out of paper. Be sure and disable your phone number from being printed on the fax and also disable caller I.D. This prank is great to get even with a business or individual who has somehow cheated you.
THE WILL
A lawyer was reading the Will of a rich man, to the people mentioned in the Will:
"To my loving wife Rose, who stood by me in the rough times, as well as the good; the house and $2 million.
"To my daughter Jessica, who looked after during my illness and kept the business going: the yacht, the business and $1 million.
"And to my cousin Dan, who hated me, argued with me and thought I would not remember him in my Will. You were wrong: Hello Dan!"
TELEMARKETERS
1. If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for
bankruptcy and you could sure use some money. Ask, "How long can I keep it? Do I have to ever pay it back, or is it like the other money I borrowed before my bankruptcy?"
2. If you get one of those pushy people who won't shut up, just
listen to their sales pitch. When they try to close the sale, tell them that you'll need to go get your credit card. Then, just set the phone down and go do laundry, shopping or whatever. See how long they wait for you to get your credit card. Or if you are busy, at the beginning of the phone call, just say...."Can you hang on for a minute?" Then just set the phone down and walk away.
3. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one seems to care these days and I have all these problems, my sciatica is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died....and I have a pain in the neck. Let's see now, when did that start. Oh yeah, when I answered the phone." *G* If they try to get back to the sales process, just continue on with telling about your problems.
4. If the person says he's Joe Doe from the ABC Company, ask him to spell his name, then ask him to spell the company name, then ask where it is located. Continue asking personal questions or questions about the company for as long as necessary.
7. Say, "No," over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each no, and keep an even tempo even as they're trying to speak. This is the most fun if you can keep going until they hang up.
8. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up with their Family and Friends plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can muster, "I don't have any friends...would you be my friend?"
10. Let the person go through their spiel, providing minimal but necessary feedback in the form of an occasional "Uh-huh, really, or, "That's fascinating." Finally, when they ask you to buy, tell them you couldn't give your credit card number to someone who's a complete stranger.
12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy and if they will give you
their phone number you will call them back. If they say they are not allowed to give out their number, then ask them for their home number and tell them you will call them at home (this is usually the most effective method of getting rid of Telemarketers). If the person says, "Well, I don't really want to get a call at home," say, "Now you know how I feel." (smiling, of course...)
13. This one not only works, but it is funny to hear their reaction. *G* When you answer the phone, say "Hello" Then when they start with "Hi, this is John from ABC Co." break in and say, "I don't want to be rude, but I was just reaching for the phone to call the fire department, My house is on fire and I really need to go, so I can call them" (Yes, it really happened to me and, Yes, my house was on fire. Well....the washing machine was.)
ADVERTISEMENTS IN BILLS
Doesn't it "trip your trigger" that they put advertisements in
with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to
stuff junk mail in there with them. I get back at them. I put garbage
in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels . . .
I write, "Could you throw this away for me? Thank you."
"Actually, I just send the ads back to them....Tin"
back to
Payback
onward
From the Ol'Mailbag
To write to the TinChicken
Click on the chick
Take out the words, "NoSpam"
